10 Songs We'd Like to See Performed on Glee

Posted at 5:07 AM Oct 13, 2009

By Kiala Kazebee

Like everyone else in the free world, I stopped watching Glee shortly after the disappointing follow-up to the exceptionally awesome pilot episode. Unfortunately, I had decided to write this list of songs I'd like to see performed on the show prior to being stricken with the mighty meh of Glee ennui, and so I've had to spend the majority of my weekend catching up on the fictional shenanigans of  William McKinley High School and ... it's not that bad, actually. Not great, but way better than that America's Got Talent crap.

The Glee kids are not too annoying and the anti-abstinence subplot is enjoyably subversive as is everything Jane Lynch does. I'm not as hot-to-trot on the Kristen Chenowith addition as the rest of the blogosphere seems to be, but a resounding "feh" from me is better than a *facepalm*, am I right? Anyway, all that Glee watching I've done in the interest of science has resulted in this list of songs that, if performed, might actually make me set the DVR to record. 

10. "Let's Do It," by Joan Jett and Paul Westerberg

So many Glee couples could sing this together, but my vote goes to a Jane Lynch/Kristen Chenowith pairing or maybe that kid in the wheelchair and the cheerleader Quinn. Or two cheerleaders ... I'm sorry, my mind just went to it's special place.

9. "Look What You've Done," by Jet

My guilty pleasure/drunken jukebox song choice could easily be given new life by an Emma Pillsbury rendition lamenting her status as a soon-to-be "homewrecker". And considering her tendency toward OCD, that term couldn't be more ironic.

Read more 10 Songs We'd Like... >>

Dear Diary, Levar Burton, "Let's whup some ass!!!"

Posted at 4:00 PM Mar 13, 2009

By Sharon Steel

Twitter has morphed into a virtual celebrity war-zone. We were more concerned than amused when Ashton Kutcher started using his account to sling insults at Perez Hilton, who returned in kind. But last month, EW's Popwatch told us about a hilarious feud heretofore known as "LeWar."

Michael Ian Black launched LeWar after noting that Levar Burton had over 30,000 Twitter followers to his 6,000. Black mused on his blog: "Yes, LeVar was on "Star Trek." Yes, he hosted "Reading Rainbow." But do thirty thousand people need to know what he's up to at any and all hours? Are thirty thousand people feeling their mobile phones vibrate and thinking to themselves, 'That must be LeVar'?" Apparently so! Since LeWar got underway, Burton and Black's list of followers have both have been climbing steadily. Let's check in with @levarburton first:

OK Y'all... @michaelianbeck seems committed to this folly. Let's whup some ass!!!

Tossed and turned all night. @michaelianblack has disturbed my peace. Must come to a decision as to a response or sleep no more!

Happy Monday everyone! For the record I am still not smoking in spite of the stress being caused by @michaelianblack an his infernal war.

I expected a guy like Michael Ian Black to be more appreciative for my having helped him gain thousands of followers almost overnight.

Hey now, Burton, perhaps you should be thanking Black! There's a chance all the LeWar publicity helped you ink a Reading Rainbow t-shirt deal with Urban Outfitters. Or maybe it was just the guy rocking the RR shirt on The Price Is Right?

Dear Diary, Robert Pattinson (maybe), "Just had nightmare that Kristen was huge Hello Kitty doll..."

Posted at 4:00 PM Mar 06, 2009

By Sharon Steel

EW's Popwatch is pretty sure that @fakerpattz isn't actually Robert Pattinson's real Twitter feed. But oh, wouldn't it be lovely if it was? He actually writes back to his stalkers followers, regularly throws out quips about how quickly his hair is growing back to its former Edward Cullen-esque glory, and has enjoys sharing the details of his bizarre nightmares. Herein, some of our favorite recent tweets:

This must have had something to do with that M.A.C. ad:

Just had nightmare that Kristen was huge Hello Kitty doll destroying Tokyo until someone said Twilight. Then she self combusted. Weird.
Rehearsals start soon. Still bummed my hair is not up for Best Supporting Actor.
Why not Best Actor? Don't sell yourself short, Patz.

Paparazzi are following me everywhere. Expect to see a shot of me on the loo soon. Wouldn't be surprised.
We've been warned.

My Edward hair is almost back now. It's scary how much nonsense was made over my hair!
Did you mean scary as in extremely flattering and you hope it never ends?

Sometimes I have nightmares that quacking ducks are chasing me.
Hm. Taylor Lautner probably dreams of kittens.

Dear Diary, M.C. Hammer, "Do you know who you are?"

Posted at 4:00 PM Feb 27, 2009

By Sharon Steel

We've been addicted to Shaq's Twitter for awhile now, but MC Hammer is quickly becoming a top competitor with his own 140-character life-lessons. And with over 100,000 people (and counting!) following @MCHammer, we're pretty sure we're not the only converts. A few of our favorite recent Tweets by Mr. Hammer-time:

On the silver lining in our financial woes:

Even during a recession we have the ability & freedom to create and explore new opportunities, birth new concepts & plant seeds to harvest
On the Tweet-high-club:

WIFI In The Sky... Tweeting in the real "Cloud" !!! does that compute ?
On the other side of fame-whoring:

Celebrity in and of itself is nothing but an empty shell. What did you contribute to society ? Only your works will stand !!
On life's most existential questions:

Do you know who you are ?
No, but we really hope you'll Tweet us all the answers. Why hasn't anyone pitched Hammer and Shaq: Deep thoughts from the Twitterverse as a paperback original? We guess Hammer is too busy being a Silicon Alley mogul to bother with book writing. We have no idea as to why he visited the offices of YouTube three years ago, as seen in the video above. But we love that documentation exists of its occurrence.

Dear Diary, Britney Spears, "Yesterday's If You Seek Amy shoot was super sexy and really fun!"

Posted at 4:00 PM Feb 20, 2009

By Sharon Steel

Of course Britney Spears is on Twitter. Did you think it was limited to Times tech reporter David Pogue, or those crazy kids Ashton and Demi? Certainly not. Last time we checked in with Britters, she was pissing off the Parents Television Council. And it looks like she just shot a video that may very well piss them off even more:

Yesterday's If You Seek Amy shoot was super sexy and really fun! I can't wait for you all to see it. <3 Britney
Super sexy = KEEP YOUR CHILDRENS FAR, FAR AWAY. But it's not all work for dear Britney. And she wants us to know it.

Hung out by the pool yesterday, checked out some sketches of costumes for the tour & rented Pride and Glory. The costumes are crazy! ~Brit

I had a nice, restful evening and got a great massage last night. ~Brit
Other days, she turns her Twittering duties over to someone named "Lauren," who is forced to report on her boss lady's sugar intake:

Britney went to Jerry's Deli last night for after shopping at Target. She had a black and white milkshake with dinner. ~Lauren

Just found out that Britney had Pinkberry Sunday night. She gets the plain flavor with berries on it. Yum! ~Lauren
But when she's traveling around the world, Britney makes sure she's the one getting her prescient thoughts and observations about her surroundings across. Trust no one.
I love Japan! I think all the tiny cars are so cute! -Britney

Dear Diary, Justine Bateman, "God would never have made your arms as long as he did if He didn't want you to take care of things."

Posted at 4:00 PM Feb 13, 2009

By Sharon Steel

Justine Bateman has a Tumblr, and she takes it very seriously -- in fact, we sometimes wonder if she does anything else all day. But we're glad she doesn't, because her blog, Pony Pony Show (where, inexplicably, she posts as "tanya 77") is a candy-orange, potty-mouthed hodgepodge of memes, Internet candy, and candid pictures of herself. For this week's Dear Diary feature, we'll highlight three of our favorite recent posts.

On Hillary Duff's difficulty in choosing a name for her new line of clothes:

I fucking weep for the youth of this country.

On the announcement of a feature film based on Candyland:

Dear God, please don't let them fuck this up.

Love, me.

On those "Ex-Masturbator" t-shirts everyone flipped their shit about:

OK. Let's all calm down and think a bit. God would never have made your arms as long as he did if He didn't want you to take care of things. 

Additionally, if you want to play around with abstinence-before-marriage, you're in for an insane existence as you try to not let your hands brush your skin for the years it will take to meet a suitable mate. Or you'll marry the first person you can get your hands on because you'll need it that badly.

Then you will, years later, scour the Bible looking for scripture to back up the personal sexual denial you inflicted on yourself for years by not masterbating and you will not find it and you WILL BE PISSED.

Consider our girl crush on Mallory officially revived.

Read more Dear Diary, Justine... >>

Dear Diary, Demi Moore, "I hope the positive twitterer attitude infects the world"

Posted at 4:00 PM Feb 06, 2009

By Sharon Steel

Demi Moore (@mrskutcher) joined Twitter not too long ago at the recommendation of her husband, Ashton (@aplusk). We knew we had to follow her as soon as we saw her avatar -- a grainy, pre-teen photo she described as "super geek material I am afraid. better than when I wore a patch on top of the glasses." Let's check in on the latest in the Kutcher-Moore household:

I need a computer upgrade clearly but that will have to wait until after I explore the latest casualties on American Idol!

Jan 28, 2009 5:33 a.m. from web

I hope the positive twitterer attitude infects the world.

Jan 28, 2009 5:39 p.m. from web

I am learning something new everyday on twitter! thanks twitterers!

yesterday 3:24 a.m. from web
Who knew Twitter was the online equivalent of the Tao? Mrs. Kutcher did. But as much as she hearts Twittering about how inspiring Twitter is, she uses micro-blogging to bitch, just like us!

Read more Dear Diary, Demi... >>

Dear Diary, Mischa Barton, "I cried, I won't lie."

Posted at 4:00 PM Jan 30, 2009

By Sharon Steel

We've been drowning in DVR'd The O.C. re-runs lately, and we have to admit to ourselves that it's aged like a fine, fine wine. We highly recommend re-experiencing the Seth and Summer indie-romance. Oh, and Ryan and Marissa are there, too. We'd been wondering what Mischa Barton was up to lately. Besides modeling... she's blogging. And last week, while we here at HD HQ enjoyed the Inaugration of our 44th President and maybe wept a little with the rest of our country, Mischa Barton was crying, too.

I think that the inauguration today was absolutely incredible. Obama's speech rung so true and is the reason why I made myself an American citizen.

I cried, I won't lie. I cried for the people being hit by our economic crisis, including my friends, and for the people who don't understand the spirit of good Americans. I cried because I had a press day where I had to answer worthless questions about fame and his speech was so right that that has nothing to do with the hard work that made the fabric of the American nation.

Had he not won, I would not be proud to be an American any longer.  I live in France for the freedom America once offered -- I have all my faith in Obama. I'm not a religious person but may God bless him and his family.
Mischa may have been embarrassed to answer "worthless questions about fame" on January 20, but isn't she secretly probably kinda thrilled she's been featured in the same magazine as her new hero?

Dear Diary, Tina Fey, "Interwebz here I come!"

Posted at 4:00 PM Jan 23, 2009

By Sharon Steel

TinaFey.jpgTina Fey is one tough dame: we've never been more delighted to hear someone hijack their own award thank-you speech as an opportunity to tell some semi-anonymous Internet haters to "suck it." For today's Dear Diary feature, we're turning to Fey's Twitter, @TinaFey (we hope it's real), in which she shares her private musings about Cheetos, Apple customer service, and Obama's toenails:

I'm not ashamed to admit this can of cheetos has been rolling around my desk drawer since 2006. And they're still good.

Phew! Macbook back from wherever they send these things. Interwebz here I come!

Somewhere a man named Barack Obama sits on a toilet and thinks the same thing I do: I need to trim my toe nails.
Maybe if we're very, very good, one day she'll micro-blog mini-excerpts from her forthcoming book of comedic essays.

Dear Diary, Shaquille O'Neal, "Laugh as much as u breathe, its a true stress reliever, trust me."

Posted at 4:00 PM Jan 16, 2009

By Sharon Steel

Shaq_at_the_white_house.jpgPhoenix Suns center Shaquille O'Neal is pretty much the most prolific Twitter user out there. Microblogging takes on a kind of poetry on @The_Real_Shaq, which has over 27,000 followers. After the jump, we'll delve into the Interweb psyche of a man who, on occasion, signs off on his Tweets with "Shaquille oneal." It's like what your Mom does in IM messages when she writes "Love Mom," even though it isn't a formal letter, and you already know you're talking to her. Whimsical, isn't it? (Sidenote: How amazing is that picture of him with Dubya?)

Read more Dear Diary, Shaquille... >>

Dear Diary, Coco Rocha, "You know what is more tiresome then going to the gym? Going shopping!"

Posted at 4:00 PM Jan 09, 2009

By Sharon Steel

coco.JPGCanadian model Coco Rocha (we kinda love that she's a total goofball) has been a fixture on the Interweb fashion scene for about a month now -- her first blog post on Oh So Coco unveiled her status as a Ginger. After the jump, we'll take a closer look at what Rocha, a devotee of the multiple exclamation point, has been up to since December.

Read more Dear Diary, Coco... >>

Dear Diary, Sean Penn, "There I was with the biggest hair on the planet..."

Posted at 4:00 PM Dec 19, 2008

By Sharon Steel

seanpenn.JPGThe New Yorker's George Packer brought our attention (in a delightfully snarky blog post -- Remnick, keep 'em at it!) to Sean Penn's cover story for this December's Nation magazine, which includes a lengthy, seven-hour interview with Raúl Castro, Cuba's new chief exec. Apparently, all that "best actor ever" praise went to Penn's head, and now he fancies himself a foreign correspondent.

This isn't surprising -- if an actor can score a lucrative book deal without having actually put pen to paper, surely, you can interview world leaders and see your byline on the cover of a national magazine. But what is surprising is that, during the month of November, Sean Penn was posting 80-bazillion word excerpts/weird other versions of his Nation piece to his own personal Huffington Post blog. Arianna, what gives?

Read more Dear Diary, Sean... >>

Dear Diary, Bonnie Fuller, "Heidi + Spencer's wedding - my source claims this pair is strictly business..."

Posted at 4:00 PM Dec 12, 2008

heidius.jpgBy Sharon Steel

Former US Weekly editor Bonnie Fuller is currently at work on some secret comeback project that probably involves the Internets. She doesn't, to our knowledge, have a personal blog...yet. But! She happens to have a Twitter account, which she prolifically updates with gossipy nuggets several times a day (by web! by txt!). This week, Fuller had plenty to Tweet about concerning Jay Leno, Twilight, Taylor Momsen, and Speidi:

Supersmart move by NBC -- Leno at 10. Why not? Now we can laugh at not- so- late at night -- yea Jay!

Read more Dear Diary, Bonnie... >>

Dear Diary, Lo Bosworth, "My first piece will be up next Wednesday!"

Posted at 4:00 PM Dec 05, 2008

By Sharon Steel

lo.jpgWhoa, what's this? Lauren "Lo" Bosworth -- better known as Lauren Conrad's roommate and The Hills BFF with the pert giggle and the ocassional diabolical streak -- is a writer. A published one, at that.

Magazines are folding daily. Not even Condé Nast staffers are safe from the cut-backs. And newspapers? Those messy, inky things people use to wrap fish in? Nobody buys them, except on November 5th, 2008! In such a healthy media environment, it's good to know a 22-year-old UCLA graduate and MTV star, who, well, we don't know what her day job is, really, can score a regular contributor's gig (a column called "The High Life With Lo!") scribbling for the luxury online guide Pocket Change. The NYC and LA-focused newsletter presents "the city's most expensive goods and services for every multi-millionaire on your list." Financial crisis? Pshhh!

Back on November 11th, Lo did what any writer with an Internet presence and a self-promoting blog would do. She posted about her first story:

Read more Dear Diary, Lo Bosworth,... >>

Dear Diary, Jenna Fischer, "Daniel Radcliffe is INCREDIBLE."

Posted at 4:00 PM Nov 28, 2008

By Sharon Steel


Happy Day After Thanksgiving, Heartless Dolls. Have you pressed pause on family time and leftover pillaging to steal a moment alone with your pwecious Interwebs? Us too.

We popped over to Jenna Fischer's MySpace, and it looks like everything's all well and dandy since her The Office co-star Rainn Wilson kindnapped her in a vain attempt to turn his film, The Rocker, into a blockbuster. At the moment Jenna has traded L.A. for NYC; she's shooting a new movie of her own -- Solitary Man, with Michael Douglas, Susan Sarandon, Danny DeVito and Mary-Louise Parker. How's she liking New York, considering her character, Pam Beesly, just left the city to head back to Scranton? "It has been a total blast!" she says.

Read more Dear Diary, Jenna... >>

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