Sad Bastard of the Week: Feeling gloved up

Posted at 2:30 PM Mar 02, 2010

By Andrea Grimes

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Nothing so bad about having a latex fetish, right? Yeah, well, imagine the living hell that would be having a latex fetish, being a teenage boy, and having your mom know all about it. And then imagine the living hell that is being that mother, saddled with the burden of trying to wrangle this particularly awkward and awful kind of kid-related TMI.

I think living hells deserve Sad Bastard of the Week status, which is why this installation features, well, a certain latex hell, and it's not even a Savage Love column!

No indeed, it's a letter to Dear Prudence, wherein a troubled mother, "Hand in Glove"--who clearly cares about her son--cannot figure out what to do with the fact that she knows about (nay, knows way too much about) her kid's glove love:

My 13-year-old son, a well-behaved, sweet boy, already has what I perceive as a strange fetish. He loves and is fascinated by latex gloves. When he was little, he would stop in front of the rubber glove display at the supermarket and just stare at the packages of
dishwashing gloves. He wanted me to buy them for him, but he would never tell me why. Now that he's older, he goes online to medical supply Web sites and "shops" for rubber gloves.
I mean, okay, that's not so bad, right? The kid just kind of likes gloves, and Mom kind of knows what it's about, but it's not like explicit or anything, and they can live in peace together, right? Wrong. Kid didn't cover his online porno tracks:

Recently, I found out he had been visiting glove fetish Web sites with pornographic glove pictures. I installed content filtering software to block him from being exposed to such images. He was horribly embarrassed and guilty, and he promised to give up gloves forever. Apparently, it's not so easy. He still asks me to buy latex gloves for him when we go to the drug store, and he keeps piles of them around his room. He worries that he might not be able to find a girlfriend or wife who will be interested in sharing his glove love. Should I try to stop him, or should I just chalk it up to a personality quirk and worry no longer?
Ah, that magical moment when you realize Mom knows you're whacking it--and not just to regular ole porny porn, but to glove porn, and you just stop giving a shit and ask her repeatedly to buy more gloves for you and leave the things laying around your room and are all YEAH GLOVE FETISH, HEYOO, LOOKY HERE, MOM!

A couple of things: I don't think the kid should have promised (or been made to promise) to give up the glove love forever. Future (and current!) sexual issues, ahoy. Really, Mom should have written into Savage Love, because I think Prudie's being a bit of a prude in her response, or at least maybe overreacting:

Comments

Johnny Noir said:

Basically the kid has a protection fetish, which is certainly not a bad thing. He's less prone to disease and yeh, he might actually enjoy doing housework if he has to wear rubber gloves to do it! God forbid his girlfriend loves to do dishes! WTF, mom? Are you a germ-ridden pig who's afraid your son has an obsession with hygiene? Mom is the one that needs help here. Maybe she ought to share his fetish and start wearing rubber gloves around the house. It might bring them together and who knows, the kid might transfer his glove lust to his mom, since that seems to be where her head is going.

Lshygirl5 said:

Hopefully that kid will one day find someone who either shares his particular fetish or finds someone who is open to exploring and/or indulging that fetish with him. There are a lot of people who like what others may perceive as odd things sexually but there are also a lot of people who are understanding that people shouldn't be ashamed of the things that get them off as long as they aren't doing something illegal or hurting someone else against their will. It's problematic that Dear Prudence rushes to pathologize the poor kid without thinking that maybe what is worrying him is that he is embarrassed that his mom found out about it.

RubyRoses said:

Ughh this hardly seems like a fetish to worry about. Like I'm always more concerned with like scat, or hell any of the things that take place during TR's FFF. Rubber Gloves, like a little strange, but not like creepy terrifying, don't see the point of making a deal out of it at all...unless the kid is like sleeping on a pile of 1000's of rubber gloves and fapping away...

Paul said:

Nice to see that Dan offered his advice this week on the topic.

Stick said:

Ruby, now we need to see a rubber glove FFF.

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