I am a big fan of the massive number of F-Bombs dropped in this post.

Thank you for this definitive list of non-geeky things; I would be lost without it. /sarcasm. Is D&D still geeky? Thxbye.

regarding point 9 on your list:
as a former optician and victim of mole-eyesight, i wouldn't be caught dead in that sorry excuse AA calls glasses. those frames are ugly! they were fifty years ago. and they still will be ugly in fifty years. AA won't be able to change that merely by sticking their lable onto them. whenever i see someone walking the streets in such 'things' (for lack of a better word), they only spell the words fashion victim to me.
end of rant. :D

For what it matters, I got my glasses because they reminded me of the Ben Franklin style of frames. I consider that validly geeky.

This reminds me of when the red Hot Chili Peppers ruined "alternative" music in the nineties.

andrea. this was a delight. and i think i know which "trendy Austin bar" you're talking about. unless these precious knitters have begun to colonize... yikes.

This is why I gave up on being geeky or nerdy about 10 years ago. The dot-com boom ruined it for all the nerds.

This is probably why my boss tells me I take geeky to a new level and I have to insist that in the hierarchy I'm only, say, a level 4 geek. But in comparison with these "geeky" things I guess I'm a major geek.

If you have to purchase things or follow a trend to convince yourselves or others that you are a geek, well... you have your answer right there.

I think Chucks got confused for geeky when they were associated with punk rock before punk (or "punk", if you prefer) was cool. You can kind of see how a cool person might make that mistake if they're thinking "all you uncool people look the same".

That being said, is the fact that I wear no other kind of shoe besides flip flops actively ruin my geek cred or is it neutral? ;)

i think the word you are looking for is actually 'hipster douchebag'... they are pervasive and they live in my town and their knitting is dreadful.

I'm amused.

I'm going to go put on my chucks and my glasses and do some dorkalicious stuff like knit - you in?

JK i can't knit but I will work hard on your box

1, 3, and 6-8 will still get you a punch in the face from a high school bully, so I'm thinking they still belong on the geek list. These items may be tolerated, accepted, or even deemed cool by intellectuals and hipsters, but you have to remember that "intellectuals" and "hipsters" are just terms for geeks in their 20s and 30s.

I really like this article, although I have to disagree with the previous commenter that the term "Hipster" is just geeks in their 20s and 30s....as a geek in her 20s I certainly would never, ever classify myself as a hipster. In fact I shudder at the mere thought. In fact I only classify myself as a geek because those around me have called me one for so long. My own father once joked that he was going to buy me a pocket protector for Christmas (and he's a computer programmer). I've just always been the one answering tech questions, always been the one with the most up to date info on new and upcoming technology and being a 27 year old girl who still collects comics, plays D&D, still enjoys a good Buffy marathon and can use math not for real world applications...but really only to calculate stat bonuses for items in World of Warcraft.

That being said...love the site, long time lurker...first time commenter. Keep up the good work, and I swear if a hipster knitting club ever opens by me, I will begin preparations for the end of the world *shudder*

I really like this article, although I have to disagree with the previous commenter that the term "Hipster" is just geeks in their 20s and 30s....as a geek in her 20s I certainly would never, ever classify myself as a hipster. In fact I shudder at the mere thought. In fact I only classify myself as a geek because those around me have called me one for so long. My own father once joked that he was going to buy me a pocket protector for Christmas (and he's a computer programmer). I've just always been the one answering tech questions, always been the one with the most up to date info on new and upcoming technology and being a 27 year old girl who still collects comics, plays D&D, still enjoys a good Buffy marathon and can use math not for real world applications...but really only to calculate stat bonuses for items in World of Warcraft.

That being said...love the site, long time lurker...first time commenter. Keep up the good work, and I swear if a hipster knitting club ever opens by me, I will begin preparations for the end of the world *shudder*

Ha ha, No. 5. I thrift on a weekly basis, and the customers there are hilarious. 60% working-class moms with three children in tow, 35% Ira Glass wannabes, 4% crazy people, 1% other.

I have about 80 transformers posed on shelves around my apartment, am I cool yet? Guys?

I'm comforted in the fact that I'm still considered a geek.

Now it's time for the psuedo-geeks and people with no personalities to find another bandwagon.
I recommend trying out the Amish way of life. Have fun with it

I will add Star Wars and Nu Trek to this list. My only caveat is if you pull out extensive knowledge of the expanded universe for Star Wars. Do not roll up and talk about how much you loved a movie EVERYONE ELSE IN THE WORLD loves and how that makes you "omg such a geek" unless you're also going to tell me about your collection of EU books and comics, Atton Rand, Mara Jade or how much you wish 4-LOM had had a larger role in Empire, you need to step off with expecting people to call you a geek. Star Wars is Americana, everyone loves it.

What about an all-consuming love of books/libraries? I say I'm a dork because of those things, but secretly I feel kind of smug, like when I buy a t-shirt at Goodwill haha

i think that geeky vs. hip is the same as the debate between the "right" and "wrong" kind of white people, as "stuff white people like" puts it. i knit in austin dive bars. i get made fun of by drunk girls in ed hardy shirts for it. i'm not saying that crafting isnt "hip" right now,but there's a sizable group that still scorns public crafting. and you know, anything that might have a squid on it or wearing dead people's clothes.

If someone's really buying things or liking things in order to be a geek, doesn't that invalidate them from the start?

This is brilliant.

Although one really should be anything bought at Hot Topic. Yeah, I like Labyrinth, but that doesn't mean I'm a geek. It just means I'm reminiscent for a childhood where David Bowie's eyebrows were not so scary.

I pose that knitting has never been geeky or nerdy, just something your grandma does, which is possibly dorky for a young person to do. Now, knitting purports to be hip, so it sounds like annoying and precious groups meeting in trendy bars fit right in.

Paul, I started wearing All Stars in fifth grade because they reminded me of Opie's shoes on Andy Griffith. (Even though, looking back, I think those were PF Flyers.) I thought he was cool....

I remember buying Chucks/All-Stars/Buddies/whatever back before Nike bought them out in 2003 and they were still super-cheap. The "poor kids" (including me) wore them because they were what we could afford. Therefore if you were wearing a pair you were immediately looked down upon. Then "uncool" became "cool" for some damn reason and now everyone has a set. I still wear them because they're damn comfortable to me.

Ah. Great post! Number 9 I see all the time with people, I mean really? They look dumb and its just pathetic really.