Shit Is Bout 'Ta Get Real, Y'all: Don't talk about your ex--for your own good!

Posted at 1:38 PM Jan 19, 2010

By Andrea Grimes

Hold on a minute, kids, 'cause Imma jive with you, yo. Sorry for interrupting Saved By The Bell, but Imma turn this chair around and lay it down: shit is bout 'ta get real, y'all!

Since today's list was about getting dumped, it's fitting that this edition of SIB'TGRY is about exes. Specifically, talking about them. Specifically, how grown-ass people shouldn't really do that on the internet if they can help it. If you are over the age of 25--and even younger, if you're feeling precocious--consider not bitching, moaning and talking shit about your ex-lover on Facebook, Twitter, MySpace, etc. It will end badly, and you will mainly just come off as a jealous asshat.

I'm not talking about writing or discussing thoughtfully the in's and out's of failed relationships. That can be productive. I'm talking about the things you want to write in all caps on your Facebook status after four too many whiskeys. For folks of a certain age, it's just plain tacky.

It's probably the advent of submission sites like Lamebook, STFUMarrieds/Parents, etc. that make this phenomenon particularly painful. Sure, one expects teenagers and college kids to get all overshare on our asses with regard to love lost, but at some point, it's time to put your big kid drawers on and keep your "OMG TREY WAS SUCH A DICKBAG HE CHEATED ON ME 4 TIMEZ WHAT A SLUUUUUUUTTTTT" to yourself.

True, some of these overshare bitchings and moanings can be entertaining. But why? At least for me, the entertainment stems from schadenfreude. And while I love to revel in the pain of others, a long day of seeing adults use social networking to diss their exes, argue about their kids and air divorce drama just gets downright sad.

So, before you mouth off, realize that while it may feel cathartic for a moment, your friends and neighbors may not recommend you highly to all those fine fish in the sea you could be set up with in your new singlehood.


Ms. Herr said:

I love how Juanita blurred blurred, who was just put on blast by her very scorned ex-lover, liked the post in which she was blasted. And now, due to the wonderfully mysterious workings of FB's powerful algorithm, even more of her friends will know (or be reminded of) her transgressions. Classic FB!

Working Rachel said:

Amen. One of my relatives, age 25, is going through a divorce, and his wife has repeatedly badmouthed him on Facebook. Not only does this make you look lame and childish, it's ammunition for the lawyers!

Bobbyskizza said:

I love it when shit gets real and Andrea turns her chair round, makes my day.

© 2016 Village Voice Media Holdings, LLC. All Rights Reserved. | Privacy Policy