Top 10 Religious Sex Scandals of Forever and Ever, Amen
Posted at 5:00 AM Dec 16, 2009
By Andrea Grimes
The prosperity-preaching Christian evangelist with the name of a soothing dental salve, Oral Roberts, has died. The man had a university. The man had a vision of a 900-foot tall Jesus. The man had, per Queerty.com, some very specific views about who should put what sex organ where, and why:
What he didn't have--at least, not until some geriatric man or woman with a colorful sexual history shows up on cable news--was a notable sex scandal associated with his name. So we got to thinking, and lo, the shepherds of Google did say: there hath been many religious sex scandals, and he who has ears, let her hear: for lo, this is some fucked-up shit. In some cases ... literally.
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| photo from DallasObserver.com |
| Terry Hornbuckle and his lawyer |
Ten years ago, a passel of Buddhist monks from Thailand were caught singing karaoke, driving Benzs and drinking whiskey with a selection of ladies on their pios arms. The best part? They wore sexy wigs to hide the fact that they were monks who'd taken vows of celibacy and poverty.
9. Bishop Terry Hornbuckle, the "Reverend Freak"
Though prosperity-preaching megachurches are no strangers to scandal, I'm partial to the story of the Arlington, Texas preacher who was convicted of raping three women, two of them members of his church, because I covered his seedy trial for the Dallas Observer 3 years ago. Doing meth and spreading herpes willy-nilly, Bishop Terry used promises of money, power and God-given authority to assault women who looked up to him. Extra creep factor: he instructed them men of his congregation to "bathe your daughters," to "clean 'em up good."
8. Jim Bakker
Sometimes, God comes and tells you--in-between your appearances on Christian cable television--to rape a woman and pay her hundreds of thousands of dollars in hush money to buy her silence. After a number of financial scandals, duder has renounced his "God wants you to be rich" message and is now preaching ... well, this:
7. "The Family" at D.C.'s C Street
Rachel Maddow's been all over the secret religio-political conservative Christian group "The Family," whose members practice "quiet diplomacy," which includes giving a number of philandering Repubs cheap rent at their C Street house (which is registered as a church!). But it's not just hetero ridiculousness happening in "The Family." The group is also closely tied to Uganda's "Kill The Gays" bill. Remember, everyone: gays deserve to die, Republicans deserve to have their extramarital affairs swept under the rug and promptly forgotten about.
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You can't blame a guy born Vernon Wayne for changing his name, but you can blame David Koresh, the guy who used to be Vernon Wayne, for holing up in a Waco compound and committing polygamy and statutory rape with a number of his brainwashed religious followers before they all burned to death in an infamous siege.
Comments
ahhhhh the first comment. Now how can I turn this into a totally unnecessary religious internet debate in which no one will win and everyone will just be pissed off at the end? lmao
Posted 12/16/2009 at 07:31:48 AMYou could have called most of this list "The Biggest Religious Hypocrites in History." Preaching strict moral code while schtupping anything that moved.
Or in Ted Haggard's case... hating who he is (a homosexual) so much that he preaches hate and bigotry against other human begins.
What would Jesus do indeed!
Posted 12/16/2009 at 08:29:51 AMdo you find no irony in calling out a polygamist in number 1, and then 2 HD posts later rail against someone whose only crime was to object to her daughter being taught about gay marriage in public school?
Either marriage is a "civil right" and *everybody* can do it (including those that are already married, as polygamy laws prevent. including those that are related, which incest laws prevent. including those that are the same sex, which DOMA and the laws in a majority of US states prevent) or it's not a civil right and society can impose some regulation on these government recognized arrangements.
You can't be anti-polygamy and pro-gay marriage, it just doesn't make sense. You can't be pro-polygamy and anti-gay marriage, it just doesn't make sense.
Posted 12/16/2009 at 02:27:30 PMAu contraire, FLDS.
Being gay is not a choice, or at least not one that's made at any point in time in which we're in a position to change it in any meaningful way. (Though there is, of course, plenty of room here to talk about identity vs. activity. All's I'm saying is, I'm not about to spontaneously turn gay, and my gay friends don't seem like they're likely to turn straight.)
On the other hand, being a polygamist (at least, if you're one of these seedy old men holding underage women, brainwashed and hostage, as wives) is a choice. Just like you don't get to make speeding just because you believe you should be able to, you don't get to make polygamy legal just because you believe you should be able to.
Posted 12/16/2009 at 02:32:14 PMAny one who thinks that they know the whole Waco story should watch Waco: Rules of Engagement. Pretty fascinating stuff.
Posted 12/16/2009 at 06:13:02 PMI wasn't commenting on "being gay" i was commenting on gay marriage vs. polygamy. Both are most decidedly a choice. Both are outside the cultural norm, but are (rightly or wrongly) not widely recognized legally. I'm saying that you criticize one, and advocate the other. What's the difference?
Leaving aside the obvious evils of child abuse or human trafficking or anything else that would cause someone to enter into a relationship against their will under coercion or threat of violence or otherwise, i ask these questions:
What is the problem with two consenting adults of the same gender having a legally recognized relationship called marriage?
What is the problem with three (or more) consenting adults having a legally recognized relationship called marriage?
What is the problem with two consenting adult siblings (of either differing or the same gender) having a legally recognized relationship called marriage?
While I don't know you, from your writing you seem to strongly advocate only one of the the 3 relationships above. Why?
Posted 12/16/2009 at 07:02:07 PMFLDS, strawman much? How in the world do you justify equating polygamous marriages between brainwashed young women and their "spiritual guide", and marriage between consenting adults of same sex?
The rest of your post doesn't make any sense at all.. There are perfectly valid reasons why siblings shouldn't marry, it's called inbreeding and is decidedly not healthy to a population.
Posted 12/17/2009 at 05:30:21 AMFrode S,
Does the first part of your reply mean you support the civil right to marriage among a polygamous group as long as all participants are of age and not 'brainwashed'?
A man marrying his brother and a woman marrying her sister have ZERO change of reproducing, so inbreeding is not a concern. In the states where gay marriage is legal, what legitimate argument is there against marriage of same sex siblings? It is, after all, a "right". It's none of your business what those people do in the bedroom.
Posted 12/17/2009 at 06:53:41 AMGlad to see Jeffs got the top spot. That guy, and the whole upper crust of FLDS are pure evil. It's nothing but a cult of pedophilia.
Posted 12/17/2009 at 01:02:20 PMTo me, there's nothing wrong with poly marriage, as long as common-sense rules apply. And the risk of birth defects in offspring of first-cousins is negligible -- it's mainly illegal because problems arise after multiple generations of inbreeding.
So as far as I'm concerned, any number of consenting adults should be able to enter into any kind of configuration they want. No kids, no puppies, no horses, etc. cuz they can't consent by definition. I suppose brothers and sisters might still be out, unless i dunno one of them gets a snip-job first.
Posted 12/17/2009 at 01:15:04 PM