Regression Obsession: Emmet Otter

Posted at 6:22 AM Dec 17, 2009

By Merritt Martin

Otters, Muppets, tales of poverty, jug-band music--what more could I possibly need in a children's Christmas special?! Well, a bear who bears a striking resemblance to Bootsy Collins would be awesome, and a somber frog restaurateur who fancies himself a music critic or a total bitch of a thread-spinning lady badger would really just kick things up like five levels. And while I'm thinking of demands, how about some truly bizarre harmony for the first couple of mother-son musical numbers and a creepy frozen lake play scene? Dolls, after finding an online search fruitless, I finally broke down and ordered Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas, because it has well, everything you never really needed in a Christmas special...and, as of it's DVD release, more.

Originally released in 1977, this classic Christmas special was seasonally rebroadcasted through the early 1980s. As a child, I learned "Brothers," "Barbeque," "River Bottom Nightmare Band" and "When the River Meets the Sea" (the latter is also featured on a coveted John Denver & the Muppets holiday cassette tape under my bed) by heart. I remember it being on as often as A Charlie Brown Christmas, but no one else seemed to for many years. I would ask each holiday season only to be answered with blank stares and "Huh?"s.

Then the DVD came out and I was vindicated. My humming of the songs and broad jabs at plot description--"It's like a mother-son Gift of the Magi crossed with the 'Devil Went Down to Georgia,'" because they hock/ruin stuff that each other needs to enter a talent show so they could buy each other gifts they want. And, like the devil in Charlie Daniels' song, the rebellious rock band who enters the talent show actually sounds way more interesting than the rest of the acts, but the prize is only $50 and no one's soul is on the line...you know, per se. Oh, and the otter dad who died apparently left them with nothing because he risked it all on snake oil and he never wanted to cut down a whole tree so they always had a Christmas branch. I can't believe you don't remember this?! They are all Muppets--hello?!"--was, finally, no longer necessary.

So you remember Emmet Otter's Jug-Band Christmas, right Dolls? Well, I just re-watched it, and I still love some of the songs, and the weasel with the star guitar, however I don't remember it being 50 minutes long. Also, I really don't think that the son poking a hole in his mom's washtub (which she uses for her laundry service) to make it into a bass was as equal an offense as the mom hocking the entire contents of the dead otter dad's tool chest (which the son uses for odd jobs) to buy dress fabric for her talent show costume. But despite my issue with the "You can patch a washtub, but you'll never get Dad's tools back, you idiot" issue, it's still damn cute.