Cheaters once foiled by laundry, now foiled by phones

Posted at 3:36 PM Dec 09, 2009

By Andrea Grimes

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Dan Savage, he of the brilliant DTMFA and "Santorum" coinage, delineates today between the "HND" and the "CPOS." That is, the "honest, non-monogamous dude" and the "cheating piece of shit." Hopefully the CPOS's of the world will not only read Savage's excellent advice to them (on how they can become HND's), but peruse today's New York Times and find "Text Messages: Digital Lipstick on the Collar."

Cheaters have always walked a fine line between getting away with it and getting caught. But what with laundry technology being what it is these days, the NYT now says that text messages are the modern extra-relationship-curricular-activity giveaway:

Text messages are the new lipstick on the collar, the mislaid credit card bill. Instantaneous and seemingly casual, they can be confirmation of a clandestine affair, a record of the not-so-discreet who sometimes forget that everything digital leaves a footprint.

This became painfully obvious a week ago when a woman who claims to have had an affair with Tiger Woods told a celebrity publication that he had sent her flirty text messages, some of which were published.

PEOPLE. How hard is it to delete a sexy text message before your S.O. has a chance to accidentally discover your indiscretion? Isn't this what Go Phones are for? But hey, just in case your spouse sues you, know this: even if you delete the message, the cell phone company might hold on to it. For fun and sexy laughs? Who knows:

Although most e-mail users have come to understand that messages remain on their computers even if deleted, text messages are often regarded as more ephemeral -- type, hit "send" and off it goes into the ether. But messages can remain on the sender's and receiver's phones, and even if they are deleted, communications companies store them for anywhere from days to a few weeks. AT&T said that, at most, it saved text messages for 72 hours while Verizon said it saved them for 5 to 10 days.

And just in case you're brain dead:

"People who have something really private to say probably shouldn't do it in a text on their cellphone," said Marc Rotenberg, executive director of the Electronic Privacy Information Center, a public interest research group based in Washington.

Jesus, folks. If not for the sake of privacy, do it for the sake of politeness. Or just not being a giant wuss.