Conservatives consume more pornography

Posted at 7:57 AM Sep 10, 2009

By Andrea Grimes


In addition to being more likely to heckle the president during a national address, conservatives also appear to consume more pornography than liberals. You lie!, you say. I do not, sir. It's science, according to the Harvard Business School. The study was led by Benjamin Edelman, who consults with companies like AOL, Microsoft and "dozens of adult websites" on detecting advertising fraud. One might argue that porn itself is mostly fraudulent advertising, but that's neither here nor there at the moment. Let's get down to those dirty-ass Republicans and their dirty-ass taste in dirty things!

Edelmen collected anonymous credit card data with purchase dates and zip codes, and controlling for population density and bandwidth-hogging, found that eight of the ten top porno consuming states went to John McCain in the '08 election. And congratulations, Utah! You're the country's biggest consumer of pornography. So that's what Joseph Smith's magic glasses were for. Still, it looks like they might be laying off on Sundays:

Church-goers bought less online porn on Sundays - a 1% increase in a postal code's religious attendance was associated with a 0.1% drop in subscriptions that day. However, expenditures on other days of the week brought them in line with the rest of the country, Edelman finds. Residents of 27 states that passed laws banning gay marriages boasted 11% more porn subscribers than states that don't explicitly restrict gay marriage.
Across the board, however, the difference between porn consumption in various states didn't vary too much ...
For example, West Virginia, the 10th most porn-consuming state, had 2.94 subscriptions per 1000 folks, and number 41, Michigan, had 2.32. Regardless, the non-stop posturing done by a number of conservatives (see values, family and Sanford, Mark) belies a deep (willful?) ignorance of their own hypocrisy. Edelman combined his data with recent polls on religious beliefs:

States where a majority of residents agreed with the statement "I have old-fashioned values about family and marriage," bought 3.6 more subscriptions per thousand people than states where a majority disagreed. A similar difference emerged for the statement "AIDS might be God's punishment for immoral sexual behaviour."
Now that the porn industry knows their biggest market, maybe they can come up with some targeted titles. How's about ... Tax Break Titties 12, The Horniest 1%, Bush Family Outing, The Bill O'Reilly Show?

Readers, feel free to contribute your own ideas in the comments.


Michelle said:

Handguns & Hard-Ons
The Minority Whip
Big Business Blowjobs
Oil Industry Sluts: Texas Edition
Teabaggin' Party
More Bush, Please!

R3loy said:

If you take the AOL research out, I'll bet the number of cons drops. Everyone knows that Republicans are the only people stupid enough to still use AOL and pay for porn.

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