Posted at 6:00 AM May 07, 2009
By Kathleen Willcox
Days of Our Lives' Stefano DiMera (aka the Phoenix - because he rises from the ashes again and again, usually when ratings are down and writers give in to Joseph Mascolo's probably outrageous, but certainly justifiable contractual demands) is the ultimate soap villain. He has faked his own death 11 times, only to come back to haunt Salem again (with more hair, a bigger gut and shinier suits). Stefano has kidnapped and turned countless characters "evil," most notably, and laughably, Roman, Marlena, Hope and John.
The man is a delicious grotesquerie; a freak of nature; the Prince of Darkness personified; a walking (okay, waddling) reign of terror whose M.O. is kidnapping, talking in a creepy and unidentifiable accent, brainwashing, mustache-and-beard stroking, drug dealing, cackling, murder, publishing, organ theft, forgery, deceit and displaying a disturbing penchant for purple ties.
Dude's had mysterious tumors, suffered kidney failure, risen from irreversible comas ... and now ... he has ... diabetes? WTF writers?! Can't you think of a better (read: more glamorous/scandalous/gross disease, like, I don't know Swine Flu?) ailment with which to temporarily foist him from the set? This lame turn of events is most likely the inevitably half-baked result of market research ... some sort of bizarre attempt at a sensitive PSA designed to showcase NBC's sensitivity toward the increased prevalence of diabetes in America. That's great! Really!
But, seriously folks, diabetes?