Get shoe-faced with the Zappos map drinking game

Posted at 12:00 PM Apr 08, 2009

By Andrea Grimes

Earlier this morning I told you about the riveting Zappos map, wherein real-time shoe purchases from the Internet retailer pop up over a Google map. Heels, trainers and wedges, oh my! But leave it up to you glorious Dolls to overshadow my own plebe nature with pure brilliance: Doll Susan of movie review blog No-Promises.com suggested via Twitter that there might be a drinking game to be developed 'round the Zappos map.

Dear Dolls, I put everything on hold and got on this immediately. So while we may have to wait all year long to rock State of the Union and World Series drinking games, the Heartless Doll Get Shoe-Faced Drinking Game is a live event you can slam shots to any time at all. And since the world of shoes is at least as diverse as the world of booze, be prepared for a serious mixed-liquor hangover after you win--or lose--this game.

What you'll need: red wine, domestic beer, import beer and a lightweight liquor (think Goldschlagger, Tuaca) and, of course, a computer screen.

Rules and regulations are after the jump!

 
The object of Shoe-Faced is to make as many accurate predictions with regard to shoe style and geography as possible. The better predictions you make, the more likely you are to walk, rather than crawl or stumble, away from this game. Luckily, the complete randomness of the Zappos map makes this pretty much impossible.

Divide the map up according to oversimplified elementary school social studies lessons: Union, Confederacy, Texas, The Midwest, West. Shoe styles that can be called are: heel/dress shoe, athletic or sandal.

As soon as the map loads, betting begins. You may opt to call only shoe, only geography, or both. But calling both means a serious liver risk. Each player takes turns calling out the next pop-up image.

Every incorrect call means a drink!

Incorrect shoe style turns out to be a heel: drink red wine
Incorrect shoe style turns out to be an athletic shoe: drink domestic beer
Incorrect shoe style turns out to be a sandal: drink liquor
Incorrect shoe style turns out not to be a shoe at all (watch, purse, etc): drink import beer

Incorrect geography turns out to be union: drink red wine
Incorrect geography turns out to be confederacy: domestic beer
Incorrect geography turns out to be Texas: drink liquor
Incorrect geography turns out to be West: import beer

And if anything happens in Florida, everyone has to do a body shot.

Of course, this is highly simplified and I encourage readers to tweak and adjust special rules at will. And you must add them to the comments!