10 Etiquette Tips for Dealing with Parents on Facebook

Posted at 5:00 AM Nov 06, 2008

By Bonnie Ruberg

Much cyber ink has been spilled on the subject of Facebook etiquette. Now that we've stopped writing each other letters, calling each other on the phone, or just generally having any human contact that doesn't involve the Internet, we've found we need to rewrite the rules for how we interact. Forget "please" and "thank you." We're talking status messages and walls. It's craziness.

One area the writers of Facebook etiquette haven't touched on though is how to act properly when your online social space gets invaded by your bosses, professors, and -- horror of horrors -- your parents. Here then is an adaptation of the Web's social wisdom for when it comes to handling older family members who've somehow learned not only how to turn on a computer, but how to use one. Yes, this is online etiquette for dealing with those who have none.

10. Anything you write, your parents will see.

Like Twitter, Facebook is a medium that broadcasts your life to the world. Change your status update to "Bonnie just hooked up with the hottest guy" and your future in-laws will read it -- no matter how quickly you decide to hit delete.

9. Parents take Facebook personally.

Because they don't get that nothing on the Internet actually matters -- except when it matters way too much -- parents tend to get overly emotional about who does and doesn't accept their friend requests. That means, yes, you have to be their friend even if you don't like it.

8. Parents don't understand the difference between Facebook and real life.

The other day, the woman who's my model for these tips called me up to tell me how bitchy she thought it was that a friend left a comment on my wall implying I should get a nose job. Yes, that was bitchy, but Mom, you're still strange for breaking the Facebook barrier and actually picking up the phone to talk about it.

7. Parents think Facebook is amazing. Humor them.

If your parent is on Facebook, expect regular emails with lots of exclamation points expressing how mind-blowing it is that social networking has reconnected baby boomers with their long-lost childhood friends. "Yes," you will nod, slowly backing away, "yes, it is pretty mind-blowing."

6. After your parents join Facebook, you'll never have to call them again.

Thank goodness there's at least one upside to your parents joining Facebook: they'll always know what you're up to, so you never have to feel bad again about not returning their calls. What could they have to say? They've heard everything already.