5. Rip-off "FRANKIE SAY RELAX" slogan tees - These first hit the streets back in '07, but this year saw the Summer Of Slogan, where every fraternity, sorority, recreational sports league, camp, office picnic and substance abuse support group made their own interpretations. ANDREA SAYS STOP.

4. Flip-flops with knit dresses at night - Ladies, you spent four hours on your hair and makeup so you could go gyrate on your BFF at a bottle service club in hopes that some dickbag would take you home, but you couldn't be bothered to wear even a pair of flats? A hot pair of shoes can make a cheap Target frock go to an 11. If you're that bad at hitting the town in heels, stay home.

3. Square plastic retro sunglasses in neon colors - Honey, do these shades make me look like a butt? Yes, honey, they do.

2. The new Nike running shorts with the weird curve stitching - Every sporting goods store in America suddenly stopped carrying every other kind of athletic short ever made. That's the only reason I can think of to explain why every sorority girl, gym-bound housewife and jogging obsessive wears these things all the time. Their ubiquity is gag-worthy.

1. Headbands worn halo-style - When you wrap a tight piece of fabric around the top of your head, it makes your crown look greasy and your ears stick out. Also, this usage contradicts the purpose of a headband: to hold hair out of one's face, not to ensure it falls into it. Equally offensive on both men and women. Easily the most impractical, sweat-ensuring style of the season.

Are you wearing the HD best of the best? It's after the jump.

BEST!

5. Boyfriend jeans - No, they're not form-fitting. No, they don't scream "Check out my ass/tits/other sexual organs!" But they are incredibly comfortable, slouchy and cute for days when trendy needs to be comfy.

4. Inappropriately large sunglasses - It's a thousand degrees outside. You can't wear eye makeup because it's too hard to wipe away mascara, hold a michelada and apply sunscreen at the same time. But big, bold buggy-lenses say "I don't give a shit. Now get me some queso, stat."

3. One-piece swimsuits - Behold, the bikini: doesn't do much for your stomach, flies off when you jump off a party barge and rides up wedgie-style like nobody's business except your own. The array of sexily cut-out one-pieces available this summer were a breath of fresh "Thanks for not showing me your ass crack."

2. The classic collared shirt and shorts - I don't know how many times I did a double take on hot girls -- and guys -- rocking a tastefully unbuttoned collared shirt and a great pair of shorts this summer. It's a flattering look for anyone, and paired with stylish shades and some boat shoes, anyone can look like they walked out of a Ralph Lauren ad. Classy, classy, classy.

1. Suspenders - Bizarre, retro fashion trends are almost always fun, but the silliness of suspenders wins all. Wear them with a bathing suit. Wear them with knickers. Wear them with nothing at all. Suspenders say "I support pants!" And if there's anything, I support, it's supporting pants.