Regression Obsession: Rainbow Brite

Posted at 4:00 PM Aug 27, 2008

By Sharon Steel

Like many renowned '80s classics, the major plot points of the Rainbow Brite cartoon are quite frightening now that we're old enough to actually comprehend them. As the story goes, little orphan Wisp is taken by some "unknown force" to a Colorless World, where she meets her white horse Starlite, a little munchkin sprite called Twink, and seven kids named after the colors of the rainbow. Things would be lovely and sparkly and rainbow-y all the time if not for a group of animated villains, namely the Dark Princess and a terrifying being known as Murky Dismal. They both like to mess things up for all the Color Kids and cause La Brite major grief. According to Rainbow Brites' wiki, Murky turned evil because as a child:

"He colored on the walls with crayons, markers, paints, rollers, and finally an industrial airbrush. His mother made him wash off 'every bit of color, if it takes all day, if it takes the rest of your life,' leading Murky to his hatred of color as an adult."

Hella horrifying! Why did moms think this was fam-friendly but old-skool MTV wasn't? Um, moving on. At least the original dolls are still insanely cute. Can't say the same for the new-fangled version -- if it doesn't work for Strawberry Shortcake, what on earth made someone think it would it work for Rainbow?