Happy Friday! You're broke!

Posted at 10:32 AM Aug 08, 2008

By Andrea Grimes

I bet today was going really well. It's Friday, after all. I bet you totally snuck into work 15 minutes late and nobody noticed. And I bet the asshole who usually leaves a half a cup of coffee in the caraffe actually brewed a whole new pot today. Maybe that cute guy from the bar actually called, and you've got plans tonight. And heyo, maybe it's payday! You've worked hard all your life, went to college and all that shit, and you deserve that check! Make it raiiiinnnnnn!

Bubble burstage: the Chicago Tribune lists the top 10 richest teens today. Actually, their list is of the top 10 richest "tweens," but since no one on the list is a "tween" and one is 20, I've taken liberties. Somebody alert the squares over at the Trib.

So yeah, enjoy those ever-dwindling health benefits and casual Fridays. Miley Cyrus just wiped her ... eyeliner ... with your month's pay. Three of the top 10 are Harry Potter stars, no surprise there. The rest? Flash-in-the-pan popsters who will probably last as long on the cover of tabloids as I did as a carhop at Sonic back in the tenth grade. Look for the upcoming Where Are They Now: Carhops Who Had To Quit Because They Couldn't Count Back Change Without A Calculator.